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The Attraction of PositivityThere is an old saying that contains great wisdom: “nothing positive ever came from something negative”. This is true. The one exception: in algebra, a negative number times a negative number becomes a positive result. But real life relationships don’t work that way and don’t operate on this same principle. More negativity just yields more negativity. So therefore, if you are in a negative way and trying to meet people, date, and have relationships, your prospects for success are…very low
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How Much Do Looks Matter to Women?I had a very interesting conversation with a single female member of the church today in therapy. Newly single after a long marriage, she wanted to know how much she should prioritize looks in the men she is starting to meet. Specifically, she wanted me to give my opinion on, how often have I seen women “grow to be attracted to a man” after getting to know him and not being attracted at first. In other words, if she is getting to know a man that she doesn’t really feel is attractive from the
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Church Quotes on MarriageOver the years, many good quality quotes have been given by general authorities giving insight, support, and encouragement for to construct of marriage, as well as how to have the best one possible. As you date and prepare for your own future marriage, perhaps these quotes can be useful, helpful, and motivational. General Authority Quotes on Marriage: An Opportunity for Eternal Marriage in this Life or the Next: “Many of the most important deprivations of mortality will be set right
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Hope in Future RelationshipsWhen one’s relationship life has included difficult breakups, hurt, disappointment, and even trauma, it very understandable that people may lose hope in having and retaining a committed relationship. Does this describe you? Do you feel “snakebitten” from previous relationships? Does the hurt from whatever you have been through make you second guess whether you can make a future relationship worse? If so, then it may be worth your while to strengthen your hope in the future. Because if you don’t
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The Role of the Spirit in the RelationshipHere is a great rule of thumb to help your current or future dating/marriage relationship: the more often you both possess the Spirit, the better your relationship will be. Now, I understand that relationships are more complex than this and more is required than whether or not you have the Spirit inside. However, it is a tremendous advantage when this is the case. We understand from our membership in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints that always having the companionship of the
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Cats, Dogs, and RelationshipsWhat do different pets say about their owners? It’s true that owners of different pets tend to have certain traits that would make them a match for such an animal. In other words, the choice of animal a person makes gives you some insight into the individual: their personality, their outlook on life, what they are interested in, and so on. An important element of relationships is the need for new people to be sharp and effective new relationship detectives. The sooner you find out what the
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What Matters Most in a PartnerWhat matters most in your choice of partner? First of all in previous articles, I’ve reviewed basic nature of attraction: what men are attracted to in women and what women are attracted to in men. These articles reviewed those important elements that promote initial attraction and keep attraction going. Attraction matters. These articles can be reviewed at: https://www.ldsdimension.com/articles/attractors-with-men-unwritten-forces-at-work-283/
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Online Dating FilteringBoth in and out of the church, online dating has moved from the “extreme” to “mainstream” today. The advantages of online dating include convenience, the high quantity of possible love interests, and a physical safety/security. However, there are many common complaints about online dating as well, including there being scammers, liars, con artists, and people otherwise misrepresenting themselves. So how can you be successful in your online dating effort? Simple (but not easy). Pick better.
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Common Dating GripesIs dating difficult and challenging for today’s single members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints? It seems so, based upon the common and often understandable complaints I hear regularly. Many singles feel their church leaders are not listening to them or taking their concerns seriously. Singles often feel ignored, neglected, or lower status or concern in wards. It also seems true that for the most part, the solutions to your dating challenges are mostly going to need to come
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What Men are Physically Attracted ToLast week I reviewed an article looking closer at what women are physically attracted to (https://www.ldsdimension.com/articles/what-women-are-physically-attracted-to-313/). This week, what men are physically attracted to with women will be examined. Like last week, the goals of this article are to 1) help encourage women to accept that their own looks matter and to moderately—not obsessively—work on improving them accordingly (as reasonably possible), and 2) help men identify and validate what
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What Women are Physically Attracted ToIn a previous article entitled, “Universal Beauty Indicators”, some research-based physical attractors were reviewed of what both men and women are naturally attracted to with each other (see: https://www.ldsdimension.com/articles/universal-beauty-indicators-67/). For this article, an expanded list of traits women find attractive in men will be reviewed. The goals of this article are to 1) help encourage men to accept that their own looks matter and to work on improving them accordingly (as
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Conference Quotes from April, 2022In general conference every 6 months, we are blessed to receive the latest guidance, instruction, and inspiration from prophets, apostles, and other general authorities. In fact, the modern revelation coming from prophets is one of the special, distinguishing features of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Ideally, we members pay special attention to the direction and inspiration shared at these conferences. In this article, several quotes will be taken from the most recent
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Is it Me or the Money?One of the more complicated and challenging issues facing couples and marriages today involves money. Money squabbles and issues in general are often touchy, hit sensitivities, and often lead to contention and even break ups. In six of my past articles I have examined the subject of money and money related issues with relationships. If interested, feel free to review them later at these links: https://www.ldsdimension.com/articles/looks-and-money-how-important-301/
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Lessons from Adam and EveHave you ever wondered why Adam and Eve were chosen to be the first man and woman for Earth? Why were these particular people chosen to have the first marriage and to be the first to populate the planet? What was it about these two? Well in my opinion, these two were chosen because they were special, obedient, faithful people who could be trusted and counted on to effectively start the human race in an appropriate, successful manner. In this little article, some scriptures from Adam and Eve
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For Her: Letting Him Know You Are InterestedOne interesting challenge I’ve noticed with many single women both in and out of the church is the difficulty it can be letting a guy know they are interested in him. Many women have complained to me over the years that they feel they have made their interest in a man clearly known, yet he often still misses the signs. That the signs, signals, cues, and clues she has sent him are “obvious” in her opinion, yet rarely does he seem to notice, let alone act of these signs. So why is that? What is
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Complaining LessTo “complain” means “to express dissatisfaction, pain, uneasiness, censure, resentment, or grief; find fault” (https://www.dictionary.com/browse/complain). Complaining is a problem in relationships, and in life in general. It is negative, draining, a real downer. So why do we do it? Usually, we complain as an attempted coping mechanism to try to ease negative emotions: stress, anxiety, depression, anger, frustration, etc. We try to vent. Get it out. Release it. Let it go. We do so in hopes it
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