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Why the High Inactivity Rate for Men?In a private conversation among general authorities revealed in “Mormon Leaks” (if this source is to be trusted), only about 25% of single members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints are active worldwide, which sounds accurate. (Source: https://religionnews.com/2016/10/05/leaked-worldwide-only-25-of-young-single-mormons-are-active-in-the-lds-church). Within those 25% active singles, there are about 3 active women for every 2 active men. In other words, there are about 50% more
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Why Stay Active?It is generally harder to stay active in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints as a single than it is when you are married. It is also generally harder to stay active in the church if you do not have children than if you do. There are several theories for these challenges. However, the most common theory is because we have a church that greatly emphasizes marriage and family in our talks, our doctrine, our program, and our activities. Marriage and family is promoted as the ideal
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Spiritual Standards in DatingWhat kinds of standards should you look for spiritually with the person you want to date? The answer you give to this question for yourself will often reflect your own current level of spirituality. We generally feel best and comfortable with a person roughly at our own level of spirituality, perhaps a small bit higher. So if you wish to be with a person at a certain level higher than yours, it might be a good idea to get your own spiritual self together and a desired level yourself before
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Giving Positive Energyby Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) I am about to discuss something that is probably going to sound extremely obvious in writing. However, unfortunately in real life, this topic is often ignored or not considered. The topic is simple: energy. The energy we give off and present to others in the LDS singles/dating environment. Positive energy will attract, negative energy will either repel or will attract the wrong kind of person. So
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Single and Feeling Like a Second Class Member?by Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) The emphasis on marriage and family in the church can be a double-edged sword. When married and with kids, most members feel validated as a complete, whole member because of the tremendous church emphasis on getting married and having kids. Unfortunately, conversely, members—whether married or not—without kids often feel like they do not fit in. In addition, single members with or without kids often
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Scriptural Examples for Singles: Nephi and Moroniby Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) Nephi of old demonstrated that an excellent use of the scriptures is to liken them unto ourselves. He says: “Now it came to pass that I, Nephi, did teach my brethren these things; and it came to pass that I did read many things to them, which were engraven upon the plates of brass, that they might know concerning the doings of the Lord in other lands, among people of old. And I did read many things
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THE GOSPEL AND DIVORCEESBy Guest Columnist Jeff Teichert I want to make an observation about the effect I have seen of divorce on many midsingles' relationship to the Church and their spirituality. Like any generalization, there are plenty of exceptions and it does not perfectly describe any situation. I have seen many divorced members of the Church falling into one of two camps: First is the group that believes they bought a pig in a poke. They believed they were told if they stayed active in Church, paid
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Men and Women--Meant to Be Togetherby Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) I always end my LDS dating articles with the scripture from Paul that "…neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord" (1 Corinthians 11:11). And it's true. In today's world, there is a common thought that being single is fine, acceptable, normal, even preferred over being married together as husband and wife. However, this is not the Lord's way. Here are a
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Hormones or the Spirit?by Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) One of the most challenging decisions we will ever make as LDS members is who to marry, when, and where. All of those decisions matter, and all of these decisions can be influences from a number of sources. Two of the stronger and more influential sources of influence come in the form of hormones and the Spirit, also known as the influence of the Holy Ghost. Sometimes the two sources of influence
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Giving Apologiesby Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) An apology is, by definition, "a regretful acknowledgement of an offense or failure". A couple of scriptures supporting the concept of apologies are as follows: "Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God." --Matthew 5:9 "For I will declare mine iniquity; I will be sorry for my sin." --Psalms 38:18 Most of us learned growing up that when we wrong another
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Temple Sealing FAQThis document is not meant to be the definitive word on Temple Sealings, if you have a question, ask your Bishop/Stake President. What I have here is based on research and asking church leaders, but the First Presidency can always be asked for exceptions and they can ask of GOD and you might get what you asked for. We are a church lead by a Prophet, and we are encouraged to ask. We might not get the answer we want, but asking is a good thing. Let’s talk about “sealings” for a moment. In the
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Is He or She Compatible?by Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) Dating in the LDS community is flush with emotion. Is he or she the right one? Are we really compatible? Should we get engaged? How can I know for sure? These are critical questions. No pressure, but consider this classic general authority quote from President Gordon B. Hickley: “The Lord has ordained that we should marry, that we shall live together in love and peace and harmony.… The time will
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Overcoming Pornographyby Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) In last week's article, I introduced pornography as the immense problem it is today, especially with boys and men. In this follow up article, I will review some simple, practical ideas you can use to prevent and overcome the problem of watching pornography. As an LDS psychologist, I've helped many members overcome this addiction over the years at LDS Family Services and in my private practice. In
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Pornography: A Big Problemby Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) Pornography is a bigger problem today than it's ever been in the existence of mankind. Never before have pornographic images and videos been so conveniently and pervasively available. Pornography is just a few clicks or key words away on smart phones, tablets, and computers. In addition, movies, television, magazines, billboards, and many other mediums make pornography so easily and readily available
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Self-Esteem: It Mattersby Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) In psychology, self-esteem is defined by the Webster dictionary as "a feeling of having respect for yourself and your abilities". In other words, having self-esteem is having value and confidence towards yourself to be able to handle the rigors and disappointments of life. Sometimes as LDS members, we hear that we shouldn't strive for self-esteem, or that having self-esteem is bad or prideful. In
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Are We Spiritually Compatible?by Dr. Randy Gilchrist, LDS Psychologist www.LDSdimension.com (FREE LDS online dating site) Compatibility is an essential requirement of a healthy, happy, successful, hopefully eternal marriage. Definitions of compatibility from the Webster's dictionary includes, "capable of existing together in harmony", as well as "designed to work with another device or system without modification". Interesting. There are many areas to consider when considering relationship compatibility (or lack
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